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Sunday, December 25, 2022

My joke Christmas Wishlist

 It ain't your average wishlist, I can tell you that! In honor of both Christmas and this blog's continues existence (even though the uploads have slowed down a little), here is a Christmas wishlist consisting of some rather odd things. 

#30: The end of global warming

Seriously, %$^# global warning!

#29: A lifetime supply of McDonald's fries

If you're wondering why this is on the list, you obviously never tried them yourself!

#28: The ability to teleport

I wouldn't need a car if I could instantly go anywhere in the world!

#27: A reboot of Catscratch

Or at the very least, this show to rerun occasionally on Nicktoons. Seriously Nick, this series was hilarious! Also stop cancelling shows within 1-2 seasons or people will give up making shows for you!

#26: Bear trap cup

Anybody who tries to kick my balls will get a real nasty surprise!

#25: Baloney

A HA HA HA HA! Ok I was never the most creative type.

#24: Nuclear weaponry

BOOM SHOCKA LOCKA!!!

#23: Gold necklace with a diamond attached

I deserve some bling, Ya'll!

#22: Contact to alien life

Preferably the type of alien life that has no interest in wiping us out.

#21: Gills

I love swimming!

#20: A time machine

So I can go back in time and prevent the COVID-19 pandemic from happening!

#19: Some more reanimated collabs

I already have some ideas.

#18: Telekinesis

Even if I get the bargain bin version that can only move small objects, that would be infinitely useful!

#17: A lifetime supply of Pizza Hut Pizza

I'm especially gonna love this!

#16: The extinction of poachers

Seriously, what are they good for?!

#15: A dollar

Or better yet, a million dollars!

#14: A Ouija board

Preferably with some instructions on avoiding evil spirits when I talk to my deceased relatives.

#13: The ability to make any taste happen in my mouth

It's not very useful, but it will make me happy. 

#12: Nintendo to loosen up on their copyright protection

Seriously Nintendo, one of these days the extreme lengths you go to protect your intellectual properties is going to bite you in the ass if you keep it up!

#11: A big pouch on my stomach

If I had that I wouldn't need pockets on my clothes!

#10: A lifetime supply of Reese's peanut butter cups

A have quite the sweet tooth!

#9: A knight's sword

This would probably be better thief deterrent than a guard dog.

#8: Controllable intangibility

I wouldn't have to fear locking myself out of the house if I had this!

#7: A good luck charm that works

Do I have to explain this one?

#6: A giant robot

For those pesky giant monster attacks!

#5: A long prehensile tail

I could find some uses for that.

#4: Lotsa spaghetti!

Luigi be very proud!

#3: A personal visit with Santa Clause

It would be a childhood dream!

#2: World Peace

As well as Russia to quit invading Ukraine!

#1: You all to keep watching

I wouldn't be anywhere without you beautiful people!

Thanks for viewing and sticking with me for so long, even if it meant being really patient. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!