My joke Christmas Wishlist

 It ain't your average wishlist, I can tell you that! In honor of both Christmas and this blog's continues existence (even though the uploads have slowed down a little), here is a Christmas wishlist consisting of some rather odd things. 

#30: The end of global warming

Seriously, %$^# global warning!

#29: A lifetime supply of McDonald's fries

If you're wondering why this is on the list, you obviously never tried them yourself!

#28: The ability to teleport

I wouldn't need a car if I could instantly go anywhere in the world!

#27: A reboot of Catscratch

Or at the very least, this show to rerun occasionally on Nicktoons. Seriously Nick, this series was hilarious! Also stop cancelling shows within 1-2 seasons or people will give up making shows for you!

#26: Bear trap cup

Anybody who tries to kick my balls will get a real nasty surprise!

#25: Baloney

A HA HA HA HA! Ok I was never the most creative type.

#24: Nuclear weaponry

BOOM SHOCKA LOCKA!!!

#23: Gold necklace with a diamond attached

I deserve some bling, Ya'll!

#22: Contact to alien life

Preferably the type of alien life that has no interest in wiping us out.

#21: Gills

I love swimming!

#20: A time machine

So I can go back in time and prevent the COVID-19 pandemic from happening!

#19: Some more reanimated collabs

I already have some ideas.

#18: Telekinesis

Even if I get the bargain bin version that can only move small objects, that would be infinitely useful!

#17: A lifetime supply of Pizza Hut Pizza

I'm especially gonna love this!

#16: The extinction of poachers

Seriously, what are they good for?!

#15: A dollar

Or better yet, a million dollars!

#14: A Ouija board

Preferably with some instructions on avoiding evil spirits when I talk to my deceased relatives.

#13: The ability to make any taste happen in my mouth

It's not very useful, but it will make me happy. 

#12: Nintendo to loosen up on their copyright protection

Seriously Nintendo, one of these days the extreme lengths you go to protect your intellectual properties is going to bite you in the ass if you keep it up!

#11: A big pouch on my stomach

If I had that I wouldn't need pockets on my clothes!

#10: A lifetime supply of Reese's peanut butter cups

A have quite the sweet tooth!

#9: A knight's sword

This would probably be better thief deterrent than a guard dog.

#8: Controllable intangibility

I wouldn't have to fear locking myself out of the house if I had this!

#7: A good luck charm that works

Do I have to explain this one?

#6: A giant robot

For those pesky giant monster attacks!

#5: A long prehensile tail

I could find some uses for that.

#4: Lotsa spaghetti!

Luigi be very proud!

#3: A personal visit with Santa Clause

It would be a childhood dream!

#2: World Peace

As well as Russia to quit invading Ukraine!

#1: You all to keep watching

I wouldn't be anywhere without you beautiful people!

Thanks for viewing and sticking with me for so long, even if it meant being really patient. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night! 

15 Freaky af game over sequences in video games

 Some games will make you dread getting a game over. Whether they laugh evilly at you, involve the playable character undergoing a horrible fate or straight up show the world coming to an end, here are 15 absolutely terrifying game over screens in video games. Warning: This list contains some gruesome, sometimes bloody scenes. Viewer's discretion is advised.

#15: Sonic CD (US)

Get a game over in the Japanese version of this game and you'll get an upbeat song. Get a game over in the US version, however, and you'll hear psychotic violin music and absolutely terrifying laughter.

#14: Final Fight series

Holy Ganster execution method, Batman!

Depending on the game you play, losing all your lives will result in your character of choice being tied up and either put in front of a lit bomb, placed in a room that's slowly flooding or located underneath a massive crusher with spikes on it.

#13: Conker's Bad Fur Day

You know a fate is horrific when even this game can't show it!

This game has multiple game over sequences: Depending on how you die, either Conker will be used to replace the missing table leg on one of the Panther King's tables, Conker's dismembered and bloody remains will be presented to the Panther King in a burlap sack or Conker's fate will be left unknown as the game closes in on a milk carton that says he's missing.

#12: Plants Vs Zombies

What you get for not bringing guns to a zombie apocalypse!

Should a zombie make it into the house, you'll hear the owner scream in fear and/or pain and get the message "The zombies at you brain!" The second game ups the ante by showing a brain on a plate with a huge bite taken out of it.

#11: Donkey Kong Country Series

That's gonna leave some marks!

Depending which game you play, losing to the Kremlins will net you an image of Donkey and Diddy in a dark room covered in bruises, Diddy and Dixie locked in a cell or Dixie and Kiddy trapped in a baby crib.

#10: Mortal Kombat 4

Three guesses on what happens if you don't hit continue...

Get killed during the MK Tournament and you'll witness your chosen character flailing helplessly as they plumet down a massive hole with large, sharp spikes at the bottom.

#9: Tecmo Knight

Somebody's hungry!

Lose all your lives in this arcade game and you'll witness your character in the jaws of a massive beast. If you don't put in any quarters your character's strength will fail and he'll be swallowed whole.

#8: Hong Kong 97

Should've got Bruce Lee to handle this invasion!

Die to the #&$*ing ugly reds invading Hong Kong and the last thing you see before the game ends is a bloody corpse lying on the ground accompanied by the phrase "Chin is dead!" While Nexpo found out the image is actually taken from a documentary and the body is most likely fake, it's still an unsettling image to end a game on.

#7: System Shock

It could be worse: He could be forced to watch Onision videos while he's in there!

Die at the hands of Shodan and the hacker will find himself being loaded into one of her machines, turning him into an unwilling pawn.

#6: Robinson's Requiem

"Go explore alien planets" they said. "You'll love it" they said. I would've preferred Great Wolf Lodge!

Succumb to the hostile alien planet and you'll witness Treplieve1's horrified face surrounded by skulls and fire, as if he wound up in Hell. On rare occasions Trepievel1's face will turn into a skull itself.

#5: Donkey Kong 64

This goes way beyond stealing DK's banana horde!

The original Donkey Kong Country games may've had some creepy game over screens, but this one is next level. Fail to stop King K. Rool's latest evil plan and you'll witness the reptilian tyrant laugh maniacally as he prepares to blow DK Island up with a powerful laser.

#4: Ninja Gaiden arcade

Even ninja's have their off days!

Lose all your lives in this notoriously hard game and you'll see Ryu Hyabusha strapped to a table, looking on in sheer terror as a giant sawblade slowly descends towards him. Even more disturbing, there are several demonic faces watching him meet his doom.

#3: Luigi's Mansion 3

Welcome to the trapped Nintendo character museum!

Succumb to the ghosts in this game and you'll witness Luigi and all his friends being trapped within paintings while King Boo admires his new gallery. As if that wasn't bad enough, he'll turn to the screen right before the sequence ends, almost like he's intending to attack the player next.

#2: Soma

Get caught by the monsters in this game and you'll be hit by a barrage of horrifying images, including what looks like a red robotic eye and a man with black sludge coming out of his eyes and mouth.

#1: Majora's Mask

Why didn't Ganon ever think of this?

Fail to stop the titular mask's evil plan and you'll witness the moon fall onto Termina, causing a massive shockwave that destroys everything in its path. The last part of the sequence shows Link looking at the destruction before he too is wiped out.

Those are some ways to make you regret failing to beat a game. If you can think of some horrific game overs I might've missed, feel free to leave some suggestions. Thanks for reading and have yet another happy Halloween.

Sources

• WatchMojo
  
• Tats TopVideos
  
• Uproxx
  
• TV Tropes
• Outside Xbox

15 Really cool multitools

 What's better than a tool that can do one thing? A tool that can do nearly everything. Whether they can fit in your wallet, have some unique features to them or can double as deadly weapons, here are 15 multitool worth checking out. 

#15: SOG Popgrip

It's more versatile than the average phone grip!

In addition to letting you better hold your phone, this grip holds a little tool that that has a bottle opener, a sharp blade, 2 small hex bits and a mini pry bar.

#14: PenUltimate 7-in-1 pen

It does way more than write!

This pen has a stylus, philips and flathead screwdrivers, a ruler and a spirit level all built into its aluminum frame. It can clip onto your shirt so its always at hand.

#13: Victorinox Swiss Card Lite

It's the Swiss Army knife of credit cards!

This item contains many of the tools you'd find on a Swiss Army knife, but it takes the form of a card that can easily fit in your wallet.

#12: Leatherman Free T4

Finally, a Swiss Army knife for people with one hand!

While this may seem like just another Swiss Army knife at first, this knife has notches on both sides that let you open and close the tools one handed.

#11: Wallet Ninja

Hey look, another handy tool that fits in your wallet!

This credit card sized piece of steel has 18 tools built into it. These tools include multiple screwdrivers, a bottle opener, a can opener, a ruler and a phone stand (provided you put a credit card through the long, thin hole) just to name a few.

#10: Kniper Lifesaver

It's a handy tool, a lethal effective weapon and smokers assistant all rolled into one!

This sharp dagger comes with a some of the usual multitool functions like wrench holes, screwdrivers, a bottle opener and a saw edge. What's makes it unique, however, is that you can smoke out of it during your breaks.

#9: Snowflake

Ho ho ho what a handy little tool!

This snowflake-shaped tool comes equipped with 18 tools including screwdrivers, wrenches and bottle openers. When you're not using it for work it makes a good fidget spinner or Christmas tree ornament. It also has a keyring hole for easy transportation and weighs hardly nothing.

#8: Kiltn 10-in-1 Tactile Pen

It's a heck of a lot more than just a pen!

This solidly built pen has a variety of interchangeable tools, including a double headed screwdriver, a flashlight, a whistle and a glass breaker. It also comes with a case to hold all the bits.

#7: MyTask Phone Cases

For the tool man who can't stay away from their smartphones!

Made by the same people who brought us the TaskOne, this phone case has a sliding tray that holds the tools you need. There are currently 3 versions: Bike, which has various tools for handyman work, Urban, which comes with tools for urban life, and Stash, which is just the case itself that you can add your own items to.

#6: Rovertac Multitool Axe

With this tool you can pound and decapitate a nail!

Not only does this item come with many of the tools you'd expect a pliers multitool to have, but it also has a hammer head and axe blade built into the pliers part for even greater versatility.

#5: Leatherman Raptor

It does way more than cut paper!

This pair of collapsible scissors comes equipped with ring and strap cutters, a small ruler, a wrench for oxygen tanks and a glass breaker. This tool was designed EMTs, rescue workers, and medical professionals.

#4: Kelvin 23 Urban Multi Tool

Thank goodness for Kelvin!

This compact tool comes equipped with a magnetic screwdriver with multiple bits, a tape measurer, a flashlight, a spirit level and a hammer (the little coin thing at the back).

#3: Leatherman Tread

Handy and fashionable! Always a good combo!

This multitool is made of various metal links, each containing 2 to 3 different tools(up to 25 per complete band!) and connected in a way that the unit forms a bracelet. It has numerous hex keys and screwdrivers built into it and can even be used as a watch band.

#2: Crovel Extreme 3

That's one handy dandy shovel!

The spade of this shovel includes a built-in saw edge and bottle opener, the other end holds a crowbar/hammer combo. In addition, the handle is hollow for storing stuff and comes wrapped in 15 feet of paracord that can be unwrapped as you need it.

#1: Lil Trucker

This baby will prepare you for the zombie apocalypse!

This sweet little axe has several nifty tools built into it, including a hammer, pry bar, several wrench holes and a folding saw just to name a few.

As it turns out, multitools can go far beyond the usual Swiss Army Knives and pliers with tons of different tools built into them. Honorable mentions include the SwissPen X-1 Multipen (both PenUltimate and Kiltn offered more tools), the Wenger Giant (it's far too big and complicated to be practical), the TaskOne iPhone case and the OKO Odyssey water bottle (I talked about both in past lists). I'll see you later. Thanks for viewing and I hope I let your eye to some useful tools.

Sources

• Cool Things
  
• Everyday Carry
  
• Vat19
  
• Input Mag
  
• Marine Approved
  
• Snowflake Multitool
• Pocket Multitools
  
• The Gadgeteer
  
• Lil Trucker
  
• Trendhunter
  

20 Unique video game controllers

 Sometimes the standard joypad and 4 buttons just ain't enough. Whether they're shaped weirdly, have weird inputs made specifically for certain games or don't resemble controllers at all, here are 20 video game controllers that stand out from the crowd. Note: this list is about handheld and tabletop controllers, so other video game accessories will be discussed some other time.

#20: Nintendo Wii Remote

Wii would like to play!

This remote-shaped controller has motion sensing capabilities, so you can play games using motion control as well as the included buttons. The top of the controller can also act like a mouse for game menus and other apps. As if that wasn't enough, the Wiimote also comes with a bottom port that you can plug a variety of different accessories into.

#19: Dreamcast Controller

Because 2 screens are better than one!

What makes this controller unique is the Visual Memory Unit it houses. This VMU can function as a memory card, file manager and a second screen for certain games.

#18: Virtual Boy Controller

I'm surprised this never caught on. #sarcasm

Well, it's kinda unique, that's for sure.

This controller has 2 d-pads on both sides and some buttons on the bottom. It also holds the battery pack of the Virtual Boy itself.

#17: Steam Controller

We humans really like combining things, don't we?

Made by Valve for use with Steam games, this controller replaces the usual joysticks with 2 circular trackpads for finer movement and compatibility with mouse programs.

#16: Namco NeGcon

What a twist!

Made for the Playstation 1 and 2, this controller comes with a swivel joint in the center so the 2 halves of the controller can be twisted back and forth. Not only that, but it also has "I" and "II" buttons for analog control.

#15: Intellivison and Colecovision Controllers

Did the makers of these things think they were making phones?

I lumped these 2 together because they're pretty similar. Instead of the face buttons we see on controllers today, these controllers come equipped with number pads plus a few buttons on the sides. The Intellivision controller goes a bit further by having a strange disc for movement instead of a joystick.

#14: V-Smile joystick

Finally, a controller for left-handed people!

In addition to working like an arcade controller, the joystick can be rotated to the left or right side of the buttons to support left or right-handed gamers. Some versions also replace the really big button with a touchscreen and stylus.

#13: Thrustmaster E-Swap X Pro Controller 

It's the Lego set of video game controllers!

The control modules can be moved around the front of the controller to fit your needs. In addition, this controller also includes locking shoulder buttons and 4 buttons at the bottom for remapping.

#12: Wii U Gamepad

Not sponsored by Apple or Google.

Alongside the usual controls, this gamepad comes with a huge touchscreen in the middle which functions differently depending on what game you play. Some games and programs can even be played on the gamepad itself, even if the tv isn't on!

#11: Demon Destroyer Gunn

Demons beware!

While it looks like a light gun, it instead functions like a traditional controller. It has a keyboard key like control stick on the back and 2 buttons, the trigger and a little red button on the handle.

#10: Resident Evil Chainsaw Controller

Hell yeah!

True to its name, this is a GameCube or PS2 controller shaped like a big, bloody chainsaw.

#9: SpaceOrb 360 Controller

This has more directions than a Tack Shooter!

Instead of a control stick or d-pad, this controller has a big ball on the side that allows for 360 degree movements.

#8: Nintendo 64 Racing Controller

Just when you thought the N64's default controller was odd!

This controller ditches the d-pad and controller of the traditional controller for a little steering wheel for racing games,

#7: ASCII Keyboard Controller

It still beats typing with the controller and onscreen keyboard!

It's a GameCube controller with a huge keyboard in the middle. Honestly there isn't much more I can say about this one.

#6: Fairchild Channel F Controller

In all fairness this was before the standard controller setup we use today.

This vertical controller has joystick at the top that you can move side to side, push up and down or twist like a paddle controller. In addition, some controllers had buttons on the side for additional action.

#5: Steel Battalion Controller

Battle stations!

Befitting the game this was designed for, this controller resembles the control board of a war machine, like a tank or a giant robot. It has 2 joy sticks, some switches and knobs, a whole bunch of buttons and 3 foot pedals for good measure.

#4: NES U-Force

Nintendo was experimenting with motion control even before the Wii.Steel Battalionjdafar

Instead of a d-pad and buttons, this desk mounted controller uses infrared sensors so you can play your games with just your hands. In addition, it also has a flight stick for flying games.

#3: Xbox Adaptive Controller

Talk about modular!

On its own this controller has only a d-pad and a few buttons. What makes it different, however, is that you can plug a whole variety of different accessories into it, essentially letting make your own controller however you like it.

#2: PC AlphaGrip AG-5

It's a controller, mouse and keyboard all rolled into one!

This controller can be used for both games and computer functions. It has a bunch of keyboard keys on both the front and back, plus a little trackball for movement of a character or mouse.

#1: Magnavox Odyssey controller

What we have here is the ancient ancestor of today's controllers!

This controller looks nothing like today's controllers. It is square shaped, is controlled with 3 knobs on the sides instead of control pads or d-pads and has a reset button on the top.

Some controllers just like to stand out, don't they? Some controllers that didn't make the list include the Intellivision Amico Controller (As of the time of writing this that console isn't out), the Nintendo Switch Joy Cons (I decided to put the unit as a whole onto an upcoming unique console list), the Slime Controller (besides it's weird shape it's just a standard controller) and Ben Heck's Access Controller (that was made by a hacker and isn't commercially available). I'll see you later. Thank for viewing and game on my comrades!

Sources

• Angry Video Game Nerd
  
• Wikipedia
• Classic Game Room
• Ultimate Console Database
• Planet Dolan
  
• TheGamer
  
• Lazy Game Reviews
• Nintendrew
• Rerez
• I-Mockery
• Thrustmaster
  

15 Interesting species of birds

 There's more to our feathered frenemies than just the flying and chirping. Whether they have unique defense mechanisms, look like monsters or do things us humans would call evil, here are 15 species of bird that differ from the norm.

#15: Cuckoo

Just when you thought humans were the only animals capable of evil!

Instead of raising their own young, these birds lay their eggs in the nest of other birds so they can raise them. As if that wasn't bad enough, these birds also steal the eggs other birds to eat and they're willing to use force to make other birds raise their young.

#14: Peregrine Falcon

These birds are like living missiles!

These birds of prey are known for their stoops, where they fly up high and then let themselves fall for great periods. During these stoops they reach speeds of around 200 miles per hour, making them fastest animals on the planet (certain fictional hedgehogs and road runners not withstanding).

#13: Shrike

If Vlad the Impaler had a pet bird, this would be it!

While they may look innocent, these birds impale their victims on large thorns (or barbed wires on some occasions) and tear chunks off their dead bodies. Because of this they're sometimes called butcher birds.

#12: Cassowary

I heard it's called a cassowary because it's the kind of bird you should be wary of!🤣

These birds are classified by their big size and the boney structures on their heads, but that's the least of your worries when facing them. In addition to their sharp beaks, they also have very sharp talons on their legs not unlike prehistoric raptors. They've been known to kill humans and other large and/or dangerous animals, including dingos, horses and even crocodiles.

#11: European Honey Buzzard

Giant Asian Hornet, meet your match!

These birds of prey specialize in feeding on insects with stings, like hornets and wasps. They have thick coats of feathers to protect them from their dangerous prey. They are the only known natural predators to Giant Asian Hornets, which are some of the most dangerous insects in the world.

#10: Lyrebird

Imagine what this little fella's vocal cords look like.

These birds are well known for their ability to mimic nearly any sounds they hear. They can mimic not only other bird calls, but the other animal noises and even manmade sounds like chainsaws and car alarms.

#9: Burrowing Owl

I guess he thinks he's a mole.

These birds are almost nothing like other owls. First of all, they nest and roost in burrows instead of in trees. Secondly, they have longer legs that allow for sprinting. Lastly, they are active during the day instead of night.

#8: Magnificent Frigatebird

If it was my duty to name these birds, I'd call them balloon chins!

These birds are most known for their red throat pouches, which inflate like balloons during mating season. They feed mainly on fish and squid, but they are willing to food from other birds. They do this by stealing other bird's eggs or forcing other birds to regurgitate by shaking their tales.

#7: Rhinoceros Hornbill

Gee, I wonder why the word rhinoceros is part of this bird's name.

These birds have large horn-like structures on their heads which amplify their mating calls. When the female of a pair lays her egg in a tree trunk, the male shuts her in by packing the entry wall with mud, manure and food. He leaves a hole that's just big enough for the female to feed and defecate.

#6: Vampire Finch

Talk about bloodthirsty!

As their name applies, these birds drink blood. Unlike traditional vampires, however, they don't have specialized fangs to suck blood with. Instead, they peck at larger animals including other birds until they start to bleed and then drink the blood from the resulting wounds.

#5: Hoatzin

Hey look, the skunk has a friend!

Much like skunks, this freaky looking bird is characterized by their foul smell. These birds get that smell by eating vegetation that ferments in their foreguts.

#4: Potoo

Oooh, very scary!

As a relative of the tawny frogmouth, this bird shares the characteristic tree camouflage and huge mouths. They have two things that set them apart from their owl-like cousins. One is the mouth itself, which has a toothlike protrusion at the top and is brightly colored inside, which is believed to attract insects. The other thing is its cry, which people have said belongs in a horror movie.

#3: Northern Fulmar

It's a defense mechanism, a baby feeding method, an emergency food source and a way of emptying the stomach. Talk about multifunctional!

This bird species produces a stomach oil that it can spit out at predators. This oil can destroy the water resisting oil on other seabirds, leaving them vulnerable to drowning and aquatic predators. Disgustingly enough, this oil can also be used as self-sustenance during long flights.

#2: Guacharo

Meet the oily bat bird!

These birds behave similarly to bats, right down to the use of echolocation to find prey. They're common name, oilbird, came about because they're covered in oil. In fact, people in the past used to boil them to harvest this oil for fuel.

#1: Marabou Stork

When it comes to bizarre avians, these guys redefine the definition!

Much like vultures, these birds mainly eat dead animals, though they'll also take advantage of grass fires and pick off fleeing animals, as well as scavenge through dumpsters and landfills for food. To cool down on hot days they intentionally defecate on their own legs. I wish I was kidding!

It's been a while sense I've talked about real world animals, hasn't it? It sure feels good to return to my roots. If you can think of any other unusual bird species, you know where to leave your suggestions. Thanks for viewing and have a happy Easter. Also, happy anniversary of the day you rose from the grave Jesus!

Sources

• Animalogic
• TV Tropes
• Deep Look
• Wikipedia
  
• Just Birding
  
• Mentalitch
  
• A-Z animals